Umm, Is That An Official Diagnosis?

(See ya in 2014, kid.  Courtesy of Brian Bissell/Future Star Photos)

Via Andrew Marchand:

"Yankees GM Brian Cashman said that top prospect Manny Banuelos is on his throwing program, as he continues to recover from what the Yankees have described as a sore elbow. Jose Campos ... hasn't started throwing again yet. He also has a sore elbow.
'They will both pitch this year,' Cashman said.

When asked if there is any long-term concern over their elbows, Cashman said, 'I hope not.'"

I touched on this briefly on the AB4AR Page yesterday, but what kind of an answer is that?  You hope not???  These guys are the organization's top 2 pitching prospects.  They haven't pitched in months after being shut down with elbow injuries, giving them plenty of time to be tested, evaluated, diagnosed, and rested.  And after all that time, as they start to get ready to throw and pitch again, you're basing your long-term prognosis on the condition of their pitching elbows on HOPE???

I hate to be a Debbie Downer here, but the Yankees might as well just pencil ManBan and Campos in for Tommy John Surgery right now.  Maybe they can get a group discount if they book the appointments at the same time.

Things I'm Looking Forward To In The Second Half

We're just one day away from meaningful baseball games starting up again, and that time can't pass quickly enough.  It's been absolutely brutal without them this week because there is NOTHING on TV.  I barely paid attention to the HR Derby on Monday, started tuning out of the All Star Game around the 3rd inning and turned it off completely by the 5th on Tuesday, and don't even get me started on how stupid the ESPYs are.  The Yankees are coming back into my life at the perfect time, and as some people say, the season REALLY starts now.  There are plenty of obvious second half storylines to follow, like the trade deadline, Andy's return, September call-ups, and the always fun start of the magic number countdown, but there are plenty of other things I'll be following as well.  Like what, you might ask?  Well, how about...

Mark Teixeira: Middle Of The Lineup Enigma

(Something tells me that AB didn't go well.  Courtesy of Getty Images)

Mark Teixeira is an interesting topic of discussion for me.  I've loved the guy at times, and I've hated the guy at times.  I've preached patience with him, and I've called him out for his lack of production this season.  A few weeks ago, Mike Axisa of RAB commented on the adjustment Teix made in his approach in mid-May during his 3-game rest to finally rid himself of his vocal cord ailment, scrapping the more-balanced swing approach he entered the season with and returning to his pull-happy ways, and the results generated by the adjustment.  At the time of Mike's post, it appeared that Teix was swinging the bat well, but when you look at the big picture, Teix's overall performance this season is down from what we can all agree was a subpar 2011.  Something's not adding up here.

Reviewing My 5 Most Important Yankees

(This guy looks like he knows his shit, right?  Courtesy of my own awesomeness)

Back in April I tried to think outside the box a bit and pick who I thought were going to be the 5 most important players in determining the Yankees' success in 2012 not named Cano, Teixeira, Sabathia, and Rivera.  Some people understood what I was trying to do, some didn't.  With the All Star Game over and definitely not worth recapping, and regular season games not scheduled to start up again for another 2 days, I thought I'd take a quick look back and see how my picks are doing.  After my prognostication skills took a hit at the hands of Robbie in the HR Derby on Monday, I need something to restore my legitimacy (and repair my ever-fragile ego).  So let's take a look, huh?

Calm Down, People. Mo's Not Coming Back This Year

I hate to shart in people's celebratory ice cream sundaes, but it's the truth.  Everybody and their mother, their father, their mother's friends from book club, and their father's buddies from rec league basketball was abuzz today after Joel Sherman penned this piece in The Post quoting Mo's rehab doctor as saying he believed Mo could return to the mound in 2012.  I'm not going to bother listing his reasons why, you can find that out for yourself by reading the story, but they seem perfectly reasonable.  The reaction to this story around the Yankosphere and associated comments sections was something like this:



I get it.  I really do.  I worship at the Altar of Mo just as much as anybody.  I've probably slurped him in the pages of AB4AR more than any other individual Yankee, and with the number of times I've referred to him as a robot or inhuman, this story should be right up my alley.  But to actually expect that he is going to return to pitch in a Yankee uniform this year is just silly.

Is Boone Logan Getting The Joe Torre Treatment?

(Post-Jason Heyward HR in Atlanta. Courtesy of The AP)

Since being acquired as a throw-in part of the now infamous Javy Vazquez trade, Boone Logan has steadily risen up in reliever status from "he's not the worst in the world" in 2010 to "you know, he can be pretty good when you use him in the right spots" in 2011 to "this dude can really pitch" this season.  Logan has been productive enough in his 2+ years in pinstripes that it's almost fair to start referring to that trade as "The Boone Logan Trade" if you want to put a positive spin on it.  There was a time earlier this season when Logan was the best reliever out in the Yankee bullpen, and that, combined with the injuries/recent Cory Wade sucktitude suffered by the 'pen this year has put Logan in a bit of a precarious position.  He hasn't got off to a good start in July (5 ER, 3 BB, 2 HR allowed in just 2.2 IP), and looking at his usage rate already, it's worth questioning if old Booney (copyright: Joe Girardi) is getting overworked.

Anticipating Another Quiet Trade Deadline

(Expect stealth again from Cash this season at the deadline)

A few weeks ago, I mentioned the upcoming trade deadline as one of the reasons the Yankees will win the AL East this year.  This past offseason was another all-or-nothing one, as it usually seems to be for the Yankees, but the trade deadline is always a great opportunity for them to right some offseason wrongs or fill in-season gaps created by injuries or poor performance.  At the time of that "5 Reasons" post, CC Sabathia and Andy Pettitte were still on the active roster and the Yankees held a 5-game lead in the AL East.  In the 2 weeks since they've upped that advantage to 7 games, and were it not for a HR that D-Rob allowed late in Chicago and a couple of games they absolutely gave away in Tampa, that lead could be even bigger.  That being the case and me having a chance to step back and look at the big picture right now, I think we're headed for another very quiet trade deadline season in Yankeeland.

S A Big D, Kansas City

And one that just worked out for an hour at the YMCA without showering at that.  You see that, Kansas City?  Do you?

That's reality.  That's Robinson Cano and the rest of the Yankees once again being on top of the American League while you wallow away in baseball purgatory for the umpteenth consecutive year.  And yeah, I made that big enough to not fit in the post window on this site for a reason.  You're 2nd to last in the weakest division in the entire league, and you have the 2nd worst run differential.  And you're upset that the AL HR Derby captain didn't pick somebody from your team to be in the derby?!  Get your fucking priorities straight!  Billy Butler is the best player on your fucking team and he's a DH.  What does that tell you???

The fact that the All Star Game is in your stadium this year is the first thing that's made you and your team matter in the baseball world in roughly 20-25 years.  That's back when George Brett was still relevant, and not some old fart talking about shitting himself during Spring Training and getting passed on the all-time hits list by Derek Jeter.

So go ahead and boo your fucking lungs out at Cano tonight.  Doesn't change the fact that he and his team are moving on to bigger and better things this season and your team will stop playing meaningful games sometime later this month.  And enjoy the sellout crowd tomorrow.  You guys should get to experience that at least once in your lives.  I'll see you in October.

Oh wait.  No I won't.

Robbie Cano Going For 2 In A Row Tonight

(Squared that one up.  Pure sex.  Used courtesy of Brad Mangin)

Yeah, I rhymed that on purpose.  I'm that good.

If y'all remember way back to last July 11th, you may recall a little post where I correctly predicted that Robinson Cano was going to win the HR Derby.  You might also remember that I was very humble in my post-Cano victory post later that night.  Or you might not remember either of those, but just remember the stunning visuals that accompanied the prediction post.  In any case, Cano is back in the derby tonight, this year as the AL captain, and I'll be damned if I'm not going to step up and defend my HR Derby prediction title for 2012.  What better way to do that than by sticking with my homer instincts and going with Robbie Cano again.

It's a bit of a risky pick, I know.  In 129 career PA in Kauffman Stadium, Cano has a .322/.375/.452 line with just 3 HR.  It's not exactly a place that Robbie owns from a power standpoint.  But then again, there aren't many parks out there that he does.  His hitting approach in real games is different than in a HR Derby, and Cano showed last year that he's got the type of smart derby approach and smooth relaxed swing that won't tire him out to be a major threat.  Add in his ace-in-the-hole pitcher in his old man again, and there's no reason why Cano shouldn't be the favorite tonight and shouldn't repeat last year's victory.

So there you have it.  Robinson Cano and his "Oh so smoove" swing are winning the whole damn thing again this year.  Book it.  Robinson Cano FTW.  And just to tie this all together, it probably wouldn't hurt to have Kate Upton appear somewhere in here.

Taking It Easy With CC

(Is there a handful of Captain Cruch in there?  Courtesy of Getty Images)

News started to trickle out yesterday on CC Sabathia's current status and the Yankees' plans for re-integrating him into the rotation after the All Star break this week.  I commented before on how the timing of his injury was "perfect" for allowing him to get some rest and make sure that his groin strain was fully healed before coming back, and my hope/worry was that the Yankees would not rush him after the ASB just to get him back in the rotation and would make sure that he was 100% before activating him.  Given the plan that was described yesterday, it seems like the Yankees are planning to do just that and that's a damn good thing.

Game 85 Wrap-Up: NYY 7 BOS 3

(Who would have expected 10 wins from Nova after his April?  Courtesy of The AP)

Ivan Nova has stepped up since CC and Andy hit the DL on June 27th, allowing just 4 ER in 13.1 IP in 2 starts against the White Sox and the Rays, 2 games that he probably should have gotten Ws in.  Last night he took the mound again in Bahhston, still looking for his 10th win of the season and looking extend the Yankees' division lead heading into the All Star break. 

Game Notes:

- A barrage of well-struck hits and an errant throw gave the Yankees their fourth straight 1st-inning lead at 2-0, and brought their series 1st-inning run total to 14.  The big blow was Mark Teixeira's RBI double over the third base bag.

- Derek Jeter's clusterfuck performance in the field didn't help, but Nova wasn't sharp early.  The stuff was there, but his fastball command was sketchy, he wasn't efficient, and he missed his spots at bad times in allowing the Fraud Sawx to plate 2 runs in the first 3 innings.

- Jon Lester wasn't much better.  Like Nova, he was spotty with his command, not efficient with his pitch count, and he got hit harder than Nova in every inning.  An Alex Rodriguez RBI triple and an Andruw Jones RBI single in the 5th ended Lester's night and made it 5-2 Yankees.

- Nova settled down and worked through the 6th without further issue.  He started to find his fastball command a bit, and his curveball was really working.  He threw a lot of pitches early, but gave the Yankees some length on a night they needed it.

- I'd say Andruw Jones had a solid last 48 hours.  He crushed a hanging fastball that was so high it was probably out of the strike zone over the monster for a 2-run homer, his 4th of the series, to essentially put the game away in the 7th.

- A little bit of shoddy bullpen work behind Nova to close it out.  Cody Eppley walked 2 in the 7th, D-Rob allowed a run in the 8th, and Rafael Soriano also walked 2 in the 9th, but the Yankees held on for the game and series win.

Games 83/84 Wrap-Up: NYY 6 BOS 1/BOS 9 NYY 5

(Have a day, Mr. Jones.  Courtesy of The AP)

I wanted to get greedy and have the Yankees take both games yesterday after they cruised to a 6-1 win in the first half of the doubleheader, but I'll take a split.  It still leaves them 1 up in the series after winning Friday night's game and still leaves them with an opportunity to take 3 of 4 with tonight's game still to be played.

Game 1 Notes:

- The Yanks got 5 in the 1st off of Beckett to kick off Friday night's game and got 4 in the 1st yesterday off of Franklin Morales on back-to-back Nick Swisher (3-R) and Andruw Jones (solo) HRs.

- They extended the lead to 6-0 in the 4th when they went back-to-back again, Jones starting it this time and Jayson Nix finishing it.

- Freddy Garcia was fantastic in just his 2nd start back in the rotation.  He held Bahhston to just 1 run through 6.2 innings of work.  His stuff looked good, he was efficient, and he struck out 5 and didn't give up a lot of solid contact.

- The offense got nothing against reliever Justin Germano after they knocked Morales out, but they didn't need any more.  Garcia was solid, and Cody Eppley and Chad Qualls combined for 2.1 scoreless innings to finish out the win.

Game 2 Notes:

- The Yanks got yet ANOTHER early lead in the second game on a Mark Teixeira 3-run homer in the 1st.  That's 12 1st-inning runs in this series in 3 games.

- Unfortunately Phil Hughes couldn't make the 3-0 lead stand up.  He wasn't horrible last night, but wasn't as sharp as he was in previous start.  He gave up a run in the 3rd, a run in the 5th, and 3 in the 6th to give the Sawx a 5-3 lead.

- Hughes' defense didn't do him any favors behind him.  Errors by Darnell McDonald in the 5th and Derek Jeter in the 6th kept innings alive for Bahhston and drove up Hughes' already high pitch count.

- Boone Logan and Cory Wade combined to give up 4 more runs in the 7th to put the game out of reach.  Logan looks shot at this point after being used in over half the team's games to date, and Wade still looks very hittable.  He'll be back in Triple-A today.

- Jones hit his third HR of the day in the 7th, and Eric Chavez hit one in the 9th to bring the final score to 9-5.  After scoring 10 runs on 0 homers on Friday, the Yankees scored all 11 in both games yesterday via the long ball.  Crazy.

The Garbage Man Returneth

12 IP, 11 H, 3 ER, 9 K

Not a bad week of work for Freddy Garcia, huh?  And against 2 AL East rivals no less.  Good thing the Yankees didn't kick him to the curb when they had the chance.  I think it's safe to say that Freddy has gone back from being just a pile of garbage to The Garbage Man.

Awesome Things From Last Night's Game

- First 5 runners reaching base.

- Scoring 5 runs against Beckett in the 1st inning.

-The 1-5 spots in the lineup combining for 10 H (3 XBH), 9 R, and 6 RBI.

- Teix going 2-3 with RISP, including a 2-run triple in the 7th to re-take the lead.

- Ibanez and Chavez coming up with 2-out RBI hits for insurance runs.

- Jeter making that heads-up play to get the lead runner at third base in the bottom of the 7th.

- Scoring 10 runs without hitting a HR.  Because the Yanks have been hitting WAAAAAAAAYYYYY too many of those lately.

Big Sloppi Is A Great Clubhouse Leader

It's been a pretty hectic season for the Fraud Sawx, what with Bobby V joining the fold and being a general jackass, injuries and underperformance keeping the roster in constant turmoil, and the team spending most of their time in the AL East cellar.  Luckily they've got veteran leader David Ortiz to help rally the team together against all of that.

"If you go crazy and give contracts to whoever comes along despite not knowing how they're going to do, then you don't give me my due consideration, even though I do my thing every year, fuck that."

"It was humiliating. There's no reason a guy like me should go through that.  All I was looking for was two years, at the same salary ($12.5 million).  They ended up giving me $3 million more than that (actually $2.025 million), and look at my numbers this year. Tell me if they wouldn't have been better off."

"And yet they don't hesitate to sign other guys. It was embarrassing."

Damn right, David!  It IS crazy to go out and give big contracts to guys without knowing how they're going to do.  Like a guy who had rapidly declining production for 3 straight seasons and then suddenly bounced back in 2010 right around the time he got mentioned in connections with PEDs.  Why would a team go out and sign guys in the primes of their career when they could have taken a bigger risk on an older player?  Fuck that indeed!

And I feel you on the humiliation.  It must have been humiliating as fuck to get a raise and ONLY make $15 million last season.  Just an absolute slap in the face to be one of the top earners in the game despite the fact that you only have to hit and don't even have to play defense.  I don't even understand how you left your house some days.  I would have hid my face in shame if I was disrespected like that.

And it's totally embarrassing that you have to bring up your own petty bullshit AGAIN during a team when your team is trying to climb back into the playoff and division races.  When are all your asshole loser teammates and dickhead upper management going to realize that YOU are more important than THE TEAM and WINNING???  The mid-point of the season is the PERFECT time for them to give you your due consideration.  A-fucking-men, bro!

Friday Afternoon Linkapalooza: 7/6

It's been extremely hot out here in Wisco this entire week.  There was a heat advisory put into effect on Tuesday and it doesn't end until 10PM tonight.  That's heat, people.  And it's been miserable to be outside in it.  I do not envy the shop guys at my company who have been subjected to this hot torture for the last 3 days.  The level of discomfort associated with swesticles and swass in 100+ degrees of heat and humidity cannot be understated, and my heart goes out to them (from the comfort of my ergonomic desk chair safely tucked inside the air-conditioned office.  We were playing bags at my buddy's place on the 4th and within 10 minutes of being outside, I could no longer drink my bottle of Magic Hat because the lip of the glass was too damn hot.  When the heat physically prevents me from consuming my alcoholic beverages, that's where I draw the line.  Stupid summer.  Now onto the links!

- On Monday, William Tasker of IIATMS debugged the "Yankee Stadium advantage" theme that continues to pervade any kind of MSM talk about the team with H/R split statistical support.

- On Tuesday, William Juliano of The Captain's Blog examined the Yankees' season-long offensive numbers to remind us, and possibly them, that looking for an offensive upgrade at the trade deadline might not be a bad idea.

- Matt Keegan of Pinstripe Alley made a case for why the Yankees should open up a roster spot and call up Ronnier Mustelier.

- On Wednesday, the crew at Bleeding Yankee Blue had a very interesting interview with Dave Goode, a 30-year Yankee Stadium veteran as a vendor.  Lotta cool stuff in there.

- Mike Axisa of RAB, in preparation for the upcoming trade deadline, broke down the Yankees' organizational strengths and weaknesses as they relate to trade pieces.

- Mike Eder of TYA highlighted the change in Freddy Garcia's approach with PITCHf/x to show how he made a successful return to the rotation against Tampa earlier this week.

- On Thursday, Lenny Neslin of lenNY's Yankees weighed in on Big Sloppi's recent idiotic comments about his contract and the effect it could be having on the Fraud Sawx's clubhouse.

- Mark Feinsand of The Daily News got some very candid and honest comments from Reggie Jackson on steroid users, including a couple of current Yankees.

- Jimmy Kraft of Yanks Go Yard took a look at how the Yankees have fared against other teams' aces so far this season.

- Chad Jennings of LoHud looked at how the 2010 Yankee draft class has done in their first 2 years.  I'm almost ashamed to admit that I didn't realize how many current prospects came from that class.

- Fishjam25 of Yankees Fans Unite commented on the horrible state of the Yankees' catching right now, and threw some ideas out for possible solutions.

- David Waldstein of the NY Times had an incredible piece on Hiroki Kuroda and the tortorous hardships he had to endure coming up as a young player in Japan.  It's fascinating and frightening at the same time.  A definite must-read.

- EJ Fagan of TYA took a brutally honest approach to evaluating the Yankee farm system's 2012 season in light of 3 of their guys making BA's midseason Top 50.  Based strictly on results, it's hard to argue with EJ's points.

- On Friday, SG of RLYW broke out the postseason probabilities and the possible implications of the 16 remaining Yanks-Sawx games relating to the Yankees' postseason and division title chances.

For the Friday Jam, we're going back to middle school days again with "Slow" by vaunted no-hit wonder Professional Murder Music.  I remember being stoked as hell when the "End of Days" soundtrack came out in 1999; just a murderer's row of Middle School Brad bands: Korn, Limp Bizkit, Powerman 5000, Rob Zombie, Eminem.  And then there was this little ditty right in the middle of everything.  It's actually a pretty catchy song.  Too bad these dudes never amounted to anything.



Big weekend series coming up.  Hope everybody has enough beer and chips to get them through it.  No live blog for Sunday night because I actually want to watch the whole game instead of missing half of it while I write.  Selfish, I know.

Enjoy your weekends, everybody.

Halfway Point Thoughts & Afterthoughts

("Are you thinkin' what I'm thinkin'?"  Courtesy of The AP)

The Yankees have played 81 games this season, the exact halfway point of the regular season.  They're 49-32, 5.5 games up in the AL East, and they're coming off a scheduled off day prior to tonight's opening game of the latest Yanks-Sawx series.  Since there's no game to recap, I figure this is the perfect time to do a mental purge of all the little things that have been beboppin' (and rocksteadyin') around in my head lately that haven't been worthy of their own individual post.

Fun Fact: I was originally going to call these posts "Emptying The Notebook" until that hobbit Tim Kurkjian stole the idea.

Thoughts On This Week's Round Of MiL Promotions

(Betcha didn't think I'd lead this post with a photo of Segedin.  Courtesy of Mark LoMoglio)

If you've read enough of my prospect-centric posts, you know by now that I'm pretty impatient when it comes to promotions.  I fully understand and respect how the organization manages their prospects and promotion plans, and I readily admit that they know what they're doing with these guys a helluva lot better than I do, but that still is never enough to calm my impatience when I see guys absolutely torching a certain level, a la Tyler Austin in Low-A this season.  In the same vein as my prospect rankings weighing heavily on consistent production at each level of the Minors, I always want to see a kid who's shown that he's mastered his current level get moved up ASAP so we can start seeing what he's got against better competition and if he can adjust and improve his game to perform and exceed at the next level.

With the MiL All Star Games in the rearview, the Yankees got around to promoting some of their bigger low-level position guys this week, most notably Austin, Gary Sanchez, and Mason Williams from Charleston to Tampa, and J.R. Murphy and Rob Segedin from Tampa to Trenton.  After the jump, check out my take on each guy's promotion and what I think it might mean for them moving forward.

Cory Wade's Regression Into Ineffectiveness

(That's the "Joe is coming out to get me 'cause I pitched like dogmess" look if I've ever seen it.  Courtesy of Getty Images)

Less than 2 months ago, Cory Wade was on top of the world, or at least on top of the bullpen.  He had risen up to the role of setup man with Mo and D-Rob on the shelf and had me praising him for his new approach and lights out peripherals.  Last night, Wade made his first appearance for Empire State after pitching so poorly in June that he was demoted to Triple-A to make room for Chad Qualls.  A couple of commenters were quick to point out that Wade's hot start was almost assuredly not sustainable due to his lack of true dominant stuff and track record, and in the back of my own mind I was fully prepared to watch him regress a bit.  But the quickness and horrible-ness with which Wade regressed was surprising.  When your team considers Chad Qualls and his 5.39 FIP, 23.3 HR/FB %, and -0.5 fWAR to be an improvement over you, that's saying something.

Game 81 Wrap-Up: NYY 4 TB 3

(Can somebody give Joe a high five?  Courtesy of The AP)

No time for an intro this morning.  Here's the quick hits.

Game Notes:

- David Phelps pitched 4.1 innings of 1-run ball and struck out 8.  He was a bit wild, though (3 BB, 2 HBP), and left in the 5th after reaching his pitch count limit.

- David Price was filthy with his curveball last night, and held the Yankees to just 1 run through 7 IP, with 8 Ks of his own.

- Boone Logan left a slider up to Carlos Pena in the 7th that Pena crushed for a 3-1 TB lead.

- Kyle Farnsworth walked the yard in the 8th to set up the Yankee comeback.

- Big offensive plays for the Yanks on the night: Teix's solo HR in the 7th, A-Rod's bases-loaded walk in the 8th, Cano's 2-run single in the 8th that plated the game-winning run.

Happy 4th Of July From AB4AR

There are few things that outrank the Yankees in my world, but today they fall to 2nd on the priority list behind one thing- Murrica!  And what better way to celebrate the freedoms that the forefathers granted us than by stuffing our faces with food and getting drunk, right?!

In all seriousness, if there's one day where I don't want people on here reading my stuff, it's today.  Go out, enjoy the weather if it's good by you, and spend some quality time with your family and friends.  That's what I'll be doing, and if I have a good enough time I might not even make it home in time to write the game recap.

If you need a little help getting into a patriotic mood today, these should get your red, white, and blue juices going.  Happy 4th of July, everbody.





And if Joe needs something to get the boys focused and ready to pull their heads out of their asses tonight, he could always go this route:

Game 80 Wrap-Up: TB 7 NYY 4

(Nice catch, dickfor.  Courtesy of The AP)

Are the Yankees cursed at The Trop?? Seriously, what the hell is going on with this team and that stadium?  It's getting ri-goddamn-diculous and I've had about enough of it.  For the second straight night, things looked like they were all peaches and cream early for the Yankees, and then they very quickly fell apart in what ended up being a series-clinching loss.

Game Notes:

- The offense started rolling quickly in the 1st.  A pair of doubles by Derek Jeter and Curtis Granderson made it 1-0, and a Robinson Cano RBI single made it 2-0.  But Cano brainfarted on how many outs there were and got doubled up on a flyout to end the inning.  It was the first of many gaffes by the Yankees on the night.

- A Dewayne Wise solo shot in the 3rd made it 3-0, and it looked like the Yankees were fixing to cruise to another beatdown of James Shields, but the wheels came off Ivan Nova's wagon in the bottom half.

- Nova just couldn't locate his fastball and he gave up consecutive RBI singles to B.J. Upton and Jeff Keppinger to tie the game at 3.  Give an assist to Russell Martin, who dropped a perfect throw from Wise that would have been an out at the plate.

- Eric Chavez singled in a run in the 4th to give the Yankees the lead back, but Nova promptly gave it up in the bottom half by putting a fastball on a tee for Sean Rodriguez.  Shoulda intentionally walked him.  Nova wasn't awful last night, but he wasn't sharp either and his fastball really betrayed him after the first 2 innings.

- Martin's rough defensive night continued in the 7th when he one-hopped a throw to second into center field, allowing Desmond Jennings to trot home from third and Upton to advance.  The insurance run would score on a 2-out single by Ben Zobrist off of new Yankee Chad Qualls.

- Here's a list of the other bad moves the Yankees made last night. 1) Jeter's sac bunt in the 5th (dumb decision), 2) Rob Thomson sending Cano home on Raul Ibanez's double in the 6th (dumb decision), 3) Bringing Qualls into the game (never a good decision).  Just an all-around slopfest by the Yanks.

AB4AR Presents: The Worst Of Chris Berman On "Monday Night Baseball"

(This guy knows his sports, people)

There was a time when I was entertained by Chris Berman and his schtick.  It was way back in the mid-to-late 90s, when I was still young and stupid, and awaiting the onset of puberty to at least attempt to mature me a little bit.  I took great joy in hearing him say "RUMBLIN'-BUMBLIN'-STUMBLIN'!!!" when calling football highlights or make explosion noises when a Mike Alstott highlight came on.  In a related story, I was a loser kid.

Since early high school, though, I've been keenly aware of a fact that many other intelligent sports fans know to be true; the fact that Chris Berman absolutely sucks.  He's an abomination of a "sports personality;' a bloated, self-important, uninformed caricature of what an ESPN anchor/studio host/announcer is supposed to be, and the perfect visual and auditory representation of what ESPN has horribly mutated into over the past 10 years or so.  So it was an entertainment dick punch to end all entertainment dick punches when the ESPN broadcast for last night's Yanks-Rays game began and I heard Berman's obnoxious voice come through my TV speakers.  I was already planning on tipping a few brewskis back while I watched the game, but as I told my friend, my 12-pack didn't stand a fucking chance when I realized Berman was doing the play-by-play.

While there's nothing informative or entertaining in what Chris Berman says or how he says it as it relates to the sporting event he's blabbing about, his general buffoonery is good for a couple of laughs at his expense.  Knowing this, I gritted my teeth and forced myself to concentrate and listen to what he said last night in the hopes that I could catch some good lines, and I think I came out with a few winners.  Please know that I didn't enjoy doing this.  It was practically torture.  But my dedication to you dear readers knows no bounds.  Without further ado, I present to you, The Worst of Chris Berman from last night's game.

Waiting For "The Kick" To Come From The Horse

Maybe I just didn't pay close enough attention to the big declines in his overall power numbers the past couple reasons.  Maybe I saw what Kobe Bryant's offseason PRP therapy did for him this year and got overly optimistic.  Maybe I'm just too much of a homer.  For whatever reason, I really believed that Alex Rodriguez was going to have a big year this year.  He got healthy in the offseason, he looked good in camp, and Joe made a point early in the season to start getting A-Rod regular rest through either DH days or full days off.  Yet here we are, just days away from the midpoint of the season, and The Horse is having a pretty pedestrian year.  The 13 homers are nice, but his slash line of .266/.357/.436 is down from last year, as is his ISO (.170), his wOBA (.352), and his wRC+ (119).

The assumption going into the season was that a healthy Horse in 2012 would be a more productive Horse, and that just hasn't been the case.  Rodriguez is already well on pace to exceed his games played and plate appearance totals from his injury-plagued 2011 and he's still seeing declining numbers across the board.  There haven't been any reports about there being any physical problems with him, and with 19 games at DH A-Rod should be plenty rested, so what gives?

Game 79 Wrap-Up: TB 4 NYY 3

(What's more upsetting?  The missed scoop at 1st or that haircut?  Courtesy of The AP)

I picked Matt Moore as my AL Rookie of The Year winner.  So far this season, he hasn't exactly made me look good for making that pick (4.19/4.46/4.26 split, 4.30 BB/9 in 88.0 IP), but he did shut down the Yankees for 5 innings with 11 Ks in one of his first career starts last season, and as a young, good-sized lefthander with monster stuff, he was the type of pitcher on paper that should dominate the Yankee lineup.  The Yankees' starter last night, Freddy Garcia, is everything that Moore isn't: old, right-handed, and no stuff to speak of, and yet he still managed to outpitch Moore.

Game Notes:

- The Yanks got on the board in the top of the 1st on a Derek Jeter leadoff double and Hideki Matsui doing his best Raul Ibanez impression on a high flyball to right off the bat of Mark Teixeira that he lost in the ceiling for an RBI double.  I'm not ashamed to admit that I burst out laughing at Matsui's expense when the ball dropped.

- Alex Rodriguez and Robinson Cano followed up with line drive singles up the middle to make it a 2-0 game, but Nick Swisher conveniently grounded into an inning-ending DP to help Moore wriggle off the hook.

- Freddy worked through the first 3 innings scoreless, and looked pretty good doing it.  He got helped out by a couple of well-placed LD outs to Cano and Teix, but he was he throwing strikes and working efficiently as well.

- Freddy gave up a HR to B.J. Uption in the 4th and I didn't think much of it, but the slider he hung to Carlos Pena with 1 out in the 6th that Pena hit for a HR to tie the game at 2, at 74 pitches, was a clear sign that he was done.  I'm guessing it was a slider, because it barely moved, but 5+ innings of 2-run ball from Freddy?  I would have signed up for that before the game.

- Cody Eppley got the Yankees 1 out into the 7th, and it fell apart from there.  After being ahead of the immortal, intentional walk-worthy Sean Rodriguez 0-2, Boone Logan walked him and then allowed him to advance to 2nd on a wild pitch.

- D-Rob came in after a pop-up for the 2nd out and fell behind Brooks Conrad (also an immortal) 3-1 before grooving a fastball that Conrad hit for an RBI double to tie the game at 3.  A luckily-placed ball down the line from Eliot Johnson that Teix couldn't handle and it was a 4-3 Tampa lead.

- The Horse gave one a ride to the warning track to lead off the 8th, but that was close as the Yankees would come to mounting a comeback against the Rays' bullpen.  Balls.