On the one hand, the fact that Bobby V is wandering around the stadium in full uniform on what I presume is a game day, and taking the time to once again make himself the center of attention sets me up perfectly to call him out for doing just that instead of sitting in his office putting together the lineup card or talking to his coaching staff about how they can change things up to help the Fraud Sawx stay at or above .500 for more than a day or 2. And to turn down an opportunity to rag on Bobby V would be almost criminal.
On the other hand, he did just straight up videobomb the SHIT out of Dan Shaughnessy, easily the most unlikeable sports writer and Bahhston sports personality in the history of sports and the perfect personification of everything that is wrong with the Bahhston sports fanbase. That quick look of bewilderment on Shaughnessy's face at the 3-second mark when he first hears Bobby V's voice is gold. It's gold, Jerry, gold! Anytime Dan Shaughnessy is getting punked out like that, I smile both inside and out.
So I'm torn. What do I do here? What path do I take?? I'm stumped. You've won this round, Valentine. Well played.
July is over, which means we're heading into the dog days of summer in August. Or are we already in the dog days of summer? It's been hotter than hell out in Wisco for the better part of July, so to me that constitutes dog days. But then again, I don't make up the rules. Maybe July is designated by another creature and August is officially the dog days and I'm breaking all kinds of seasonal description protocol by mixing them up. Whatever. The changeover to August also means it's time for another round of Minor League monthly recaps and there's plenty to recap. All the 2012 picks are signed and playing, so that's exciting. And the much-anticipated round of call ups took place earlier in the month for some of the higher-profile prospects. We start the MMLR, as always, with the lower levels.
I almost can't put into words how awful this game was last night. If you watched even the first third of it, you know exactly what I'm talking about and you're shaking your head in agreement right now. I sat at my computer, already typing out the results of the 1st inning, and watched with each heartbreaking ESPN Gamecast refresh as Ivan Nova let the 5-run lead he was staked to evaporate and turn into a 2-run deficit in a matter of minutes. I was so distraught by what happened that I actually called my dad at home in Connecticut and just started venting. Eventually we steered the conversation towards "The Dark Knight Rises" and the stupidity of people complaining about Bane's voice, but that still didn't and doesn't take away from the collective crappiness that was this game.
- I bet Chris Tillman didn't expect to get 5 runs thrown in his grillmix in the bottom of the 1st but that's just what happened. The Yankees were swinging with authority, Tillman wasn't fielding his position, and things escalated quickly. A Robinson Cano 2-run homer was the big hit of the inning and the Yankes were off and running.
- And like that,
... the 5-run lead was gone. After needing just 6 pitches to get through the 1st, Nova couldn't locate his fastball, couldn't locate his slider, couldn't locate his curveball, and gave up 7 runs in the top of the 2nd after striking out 2 consecutive batters and getting ahead of Mark Reynolds 0-2.
- It was probably equal parts Tillman settling down and the Yankee lineup being deflated by the events that transpired in the 2nd, but they were held scoreless through the next 6 innings and managed just 4 hits in those innings.
- Meanwhile, Nova continued to get shelled like a bag of stadium peanuts. He gave up a pair of doubles and a run in the 3rd, and another run in the 5th to make it 9-5 Orioles. Of the 10 hits that were charged to Nova's tab, 5 of them were XBH.
- A change in pitchers did nothing to shake the offense out of their Nova-induced coma. The Yankees manged just 3 singles after the 5th inning, 2 of them infield singles by Derek Jeter. Not counting the Cano HBP, which I don't, the Yankees only advanced a runner to second base once after the 3rd inning. Talk about laying down and dying...
- Clay Rapada gave up a 2-run homer to add insult to injury in the top of the 8th. Curtis Granderson grounded into a game-ending double play in the 9th to put the game out of its misery.