Loser Guy Take Ball Off Face Last Night

Now we're not in the business of bagging on fellow Yankee fans here at AB4AR, but this is just too good not to.

Come on, bro!  You're sitting field level right down the line.  You gotta be expecting shit like that, especially when Hughes isn't on his game.  Get off the fucking phone and make a play.  This video right here, which is making major rounds on the blogosphere and TV today (they just discussed it on PTI), is helping to prove every negative stereotype about nerds out there.  If you're going to shell out the dough to sit there, pay attention to the game, take those specs off and pop in some contacts, make a fucking catch, and then pick up your phone to call whoever and talk about how awesome you are for making said catch.

P.S.- Gotta love Kay's lack of sympathy for the guy there.

The Jesus Makes Triple-A All-Star Team

Congrats to Eduardo Nunez and J-Alba for their Triple-A All-Star selections.  As the Triple-A leaders in hits and saves respectively, they are more than deserving of the spots.  Albs should probably be up in the Majors again right now with the way most of the Yankee 'pen is pitching, and it's probably only a matter of time before he gets another shot at the big time with his new 4-seam/curveball combo.

But the real news is the inclusion of The Almighty Jesus on the team.  It hasn't exactly been a good year for Jesus, who has slumped at the plate for most of the season.  But in the last week he has shown signs of breaking out and so naturally the voters made the wise choice to pick him as a reserve, lest they risk being struck down dead where they stand for failure to recognize the greatness of The Almighty.

It just goes to show how good this kid really is and how good he's going to be.  He's played like poo for almost the entire year and he's still so highly regarded (and feared by the mere mortals that he takes pity upon) that he gets picked to the All-Star game.  Once again, nobody fucks with The Jesus!!

Get Bent, Cliff Lee

Seriously, Cliff.  Fuck you.  Fuck you right in your stupid face.  With your goofy look and your dumb little jog off the field after innings and your high-80s fastball that never seems to move and yet nobody can still seem to hit.  Enjoy your little complete game, buddy.  You still won't get it done in the playoffs on whatever team you end up with.

The real problem with last night wasn't the loss or the fact that Hughes sucked or the fact that the Yankees continue to do nothing against less than great pitching (seriously, Lee threw 104 of his 115 pitches as fastballs).  Oh no, my friends.  The real problem was that with Lee shutting the Yanks down again you can cue up the marathon of people who are going to suggest that the Yanks need to trade for Lee now to strengthen the rotation.

The last thing the Yankees need to do right now is trade for Cliff Lee.  He has already shown that he commands some serious prospect power in a trade, and call me crazy but I don't see the value in giving up 2 or 3 from the Montero, Romine, Sanchez, Nunez, Laird, McAllister, Nova, Noesi, Brackman, Betances group or even any from the handful of other solid prospects the Yankees have to get a guy that you can sign in free agency for nothing after the season.

The Yankees have plenty of pitching right now, their guy just a had bad night last night.  They don't need fucking Cliff Lee this year.  They need to strengthen up the bullpen and get some consistency out of there and get everybody on the offense clicking at the same time instead of continuing to ride the Robinson Cano Express.  Cliff Lee doesn't help either of those issues, so you might as well keep your stockpile of prospects intact and then put your bid in on Lee after the season.

But thanks again, Cliff.  Thanks for feeding coal onto the rumor mill fire.  Idiot Yankee fans everywhere are rejoicing today as they start putting trade packages for you together in their heads and then furiously dial into Mike Francesa's show to discuss them.

Asshole.