Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Derek Jeter Is A Pimp In Every Sense Of The Word

"Yankee star Derek Jeter, one of New York’s most eligible hunks since his split with longtime gal pal Minka Kelly, is bedding a bevy of beauties in his Trump World Tower bachelor pad — and then coldly sending them home alone with gift baskets of autographed memorabilia....

'Derek has girls stay with him at his apartment in New York, and then he gets them a car to take them home the next day. Waiting in his car is a gift basket containing signed Jeter memorabilia, usually a signed baseball,' the friend dished." (courtesy of The Post)

This story is going around all over the sports blogosphere today, mainly with a negative spin to it, and I just don't get it.  How is this supposed to be a bad thing?  To me this is just Jeter playing chess in the booty-getting game once again while the rest of us regular guys are playing checkers.

Consider.  Derek Jeter has established the all-time greatest list of celebrity conquests in the history of human existence.  No everyday chick can bring to the table what some of his previous ladies can, and they know it.  More importantly, he knows it.  But he knows it's a big deal for them to get to meet, hang out with, and bang him.  I mean, he is the guy who did this:


And he's a 5-time world champion, and he's a member of the 3,000 Hit Club, and he's still pretty damn hot.  So what does he do?  He treats them to a wonderful evening out on the town, takes 'em back to his place (discreetly, of course), shows 'em The Captain, takes care of business, and then sends them home with a little memento.  It makes them feel more special and not just like another notch on Jeter's belt and also serves as proof for them when they tell their friends that they hooked up with Derek Jeter.  It's genius.

This is the smoothest move I've seen since I decided to skip the tie at senior prom and rocked a badass button stud instead.  It's just Jeter being Jeter and if you expected anything different you're either a moron or you're jealous.  Now hit the fucking music.

1 comment:

Rasheeda Cooper said...

Derek Jeter reigns as the biggest playboy in the MLB. For those who thought it was A-Rod, think again. Minka Kelly was just an experiment on the "possibility" train. Jeter is back!