That's a serious question. I'm not ashamed to admit that I didn't realize Derek Lowe was still wallowing away on the free agent market. I assumed some team had already snapped him up on a MiL deal after his surprisingly strong late-2012 stint with the Yanks. Came to find out he's still out there thanks to Axisa's little update blurb on him yesterday when Lowe said he would be willing to come out of the bullpen.
I definitely wouldn't be interested in Lowe on anything more than a MiL deal, and I wouldn't expect him to make the Opening Day roster, but he could be valuable in multiple scenarios for the Yankees. At best, he could do what Axisa would like him to do and serve as the swingman and 7th reliever in the bullpen, freeing the lose of the Nova-Phelps competition up to go down to Triple-A to stay stretched out as a starter for the eventual injury that will come up. At worst, he decides to stay in Triple-A after camp ends and serves that cheap veteran innings-eater function I was talking about yesterday.
Lowe might still be holding out for a Major League offer, counting on other injuries in another camp inspiring teams to give him a look. But if he doesn't get any, and still wants to play, he should be willing to take a MiL deal as much as the Yankees should be willing to offer him one.