Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Losing With Winn
The Yankees were looking for a potential starting left fielder, and at worst a 4th outfielder who could hit right-handed with some power and split time with Brett Gardner in the outfield depending on matchups or if there was a lefty on the mound that day. What they got was a dude who put up a whooping .262/.318/.353 line at the plate last year, has NO power whatsoever, and can't hit lefties to save himself.
The only positive thing about Winn is that he's an above-average outfielder. But that also happens to be Gardner's greatest strength and Gardner's offensive numbers (.270/.345/.379) were better than Winn's last season and project to improve thisyear as he is younger and has less experience than Winn. Winn is nothing more than a glorified late-game defensive replacement, but when your outfield consists of Swish, C-Grand, and Gardner, where is the glaring weakness that Winn needs to replace?
For Cashman, signing Winn today for $2 mil when Damon was still out there, still with no other serious suitors, and still with a pretty damn good 2-year, $14 million deal potentially on the table is the equivalent of asking an ugly chick who has a reputation of not putting out to the Senior Prom when the hot chick in your class who you've had a crush on since 5th grade and who is known for giving amazing, coma-inducing blowjobs, who you asked out a few weeks ago but told you she wanted to hold out and see if the captain of the basketball team asked her instead but now she just found out him and his ex are back together and going to the prom together, still doesn't have a date and still doesn't have any other guys asking her out.
Now you can take the ugly chick out and who knows? Maybe you'll have a good time and maybe you'll get lucky. But if you just went back and asked the hottie out again and she said yes, then you KNOW you're going to have a good time and you know your potential for "postseason success" is much higher. Sure, you'll have to spend a little more money on a nicer tux and probably take her out to a much fancier restaurant beforehand. But at the end of the night, when you're laying (standing) in bed (in the locker room) next to her (next to the team), covered in sweat and strawberry-flavored body butter (covered in sweat and champagne), holding her left ass cheek in your hand (holding the World Series tropy in your hand), you'll know it was worth it.
And if that ugly chick comparison isn't bad enough, here's a nice little tidbit of info on Randy Winn via Buster Olney's story of the signing on ESPN.com:
Winn... has played 1,601 career games without a postseason appearance. That's the longest drought by an active major league player.
Nothing like adding a little loser spice to your World Series-caliber soup to really fuck up the recipe, huh?