Friday, July 9, 2010

Another Reason To Not Want Cliff Lee

As if I hadn't already made it abundantly clear that I have no desire to trade for Cliff Lee today, tomorrow, or any other day, here's one more thing to consider.  If he does join the Yankees, he ain't exactly bringing his A-Game to the table, if you know what I'm saying.  Observe:


That might be the single strangest-looking family since "The Hills Have Eyes."  Cliff just looks like the creepy older dude at the college party with that shirt and haircut, his kids are frighteningly white and weird looking (I'm pretty sure his son wants to kill me based on the look in his eyes), and his wife looks like she's still a few weeks away from her high school graduation.  Maybe that shit flies in amateur-hour places like Cleveland (assuming it still exists after last night) and Seattle, but this is fucking New York City, honey.  You're going to be up against the likes of Minka,


Joanna,


Karen,


and Laura Posada, who has a pretty hot "Desperate Housewives" thing kinda going.


So this cutesy little bullshit ain't gonna fly.  This is the big leagues, Cliff.  So get your kids out of their WalMart sales aisle clothes and get your wife a spot on "Project Makeover" NOW or don't even bother coming.  We can't have the likes of these mutants mucking up the good seats at The Stadium, especially when the revolving door of hot Yankee WAGs and people like Rudy, Jack, and The Jigga Man are going to be in the house.

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