Yankees Beat Orioles 4-1, Slip Into The Twilight Zone

(Photo courtesy of The AP)

What the fuck happened last night? Were the Yanks and Orioles playing in bizarro world? Did we all secretly slip into an alternate baseball dimension last night?

- Randy Winn is hitting 3-run homers now.

- home plate umpire Bill Hohn decided the strike zone didn't exist anymore and then decided to yell at CC Sabathia about that fact.

- Jorge has apparently forgotten how to stretch before the game

- Mo has apparently been dealing with an injury to the entire left side of his body (WTF?) that has had him unavailable to pitch since Friday.

- Jeremy Guthrie managed to pitch against the Yankees and NOT hit anybody with a pitch.

- The Yankees are seriously considering calling up Chad Moeller's zombified corpse to replace Jorge if needed instead of The Jesus

I don't know if I've ever been more confused or unexcited after a win. It's still not registering with my brain that CC threw 8 innings of 1-run ball last night. That did really happen, right?