"PHILADELPHIA - There's a perfect solution to the Javy Vazquez problem in the Bronx: trade him to the Mets and everyone comes away happy.
Think about it. For the Mets there's just no getting around the obvious - they're going to need another starter to parlay their hot couple of weeks into serious contention this season. They can't live with the inconsistencies of both John Maine and Oliver Perez over the long haul.
And while Vazquez is a mess mentally trying to overcome his issues pitching with the Yankees, put him back in the National League and he'd likely go right back to being a dependable starter, if not the Cy Young contender he was last year.
For the Yankees, meanwhile, they could wash their hands of what is developing into a major problem. And the way Phil Hughes is pitching, as well as their Big Three, they could plug Sergio Mitre - who has looked very good in relief - into the rotation and be just fine." (courtesy of NY Daily News)
And that's not even the whole story! If you're really into reading garbage, you can find the whole piece here. But there's more than enough in these first four paragraphs to make this the leading candidate for "Worst NY Sports Piece of The Year."
First of all, how does trading Javy to the Mets make everyone happy? How does it make anyone happy? The Yankees would end up shrinking their pitching depth by having to plug somebody into the 5-hole for Vazquez, and the Mets would be adding an expensive, incredibly ineffective pitcher to a staff already filled with more question marks than the Riddler's outfit.
And sure John Maine and Oliver Perez have been inconsistent this year, but they have still been better than Javy. Maybe I'm thinking too simply in my logic here, but I would rather deal with inconsistency than consistently awful. At least with inconsistency the Mets stand a fighting chance with Perez and Maine on the mound. With Vazquez out there, they might as well call the game in the top of the 1st.
"... put him [Vazquez] back in the National League and he'd likely go right back to being a dependable starter."
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! OH-HOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!!!!!!! OH NO NO NO!! STOP! PLEASE!!!
/starts choking on water
/spits water all over computer screen
/keeps laughing
Sure, John. A trip back to National League will cure all Javy's ills. His velocity will come back, his command will come back, and his confidence will snap right back into place like that. Nevermind the fact that he would still be playing IN THE SAME FUCKING STATE WITH A FANBASE JUST AS BLOODTHIRSTY AND UNFORGIVING AS THAT OF THE YANKEES!!!! Mets fans read the same papers Yankee fans do; they know what the deal is with Vazquez. They would absolutely eat him alive. A couple more shitty outings in Citi Field and you'd find Vazquez swinging from a water pipe in the clubhouse with his uniform belt around his neck before you saw him being a "dependable starter" again.
And I'm not even going to get into the fact that there is nothing the Mets have in their farm system that the Yankees want or need, there is no way the Mets would take on Vazquez's $11.5 mil salary with the way he's pitching right now, or that saying Sergio Mitre has been "very good" in the bullpen is a stretch.
The plain fact of the matter is this is a short-sighted, idiotic piece of sports writing that captures everything that is wrong with New York sports fans. Javy Vazquez fucking sucks right now, that's a fact. The Yankees know he sucks and they are trying to find a way for him to un-suck. It is still way too early in the season to be talking about dumping this guy, especially when the team he plays for is 18-8 and ESPECIALLY when you're talking about trading him to your cross-town rival without even giving consideration to what the Yankees would get back or how the money would be worked out.
Put the bong down, John. And then slowly step away from the keyboard.
** More opinion and insight on Javy Vazquez in the first mini-linkapalooza tonight. I promise it will be better than John Harper's nonsense. **
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