Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Are These The 3 Worst Calls Ever?

1) Top 4th- Nick Swisher called safe on a pickoff attempt at 2nd base when he's clearly out by half a furlong.

Photo Courtesy of Barstool Sports NY

Now normally plays on pickoff attempts are blown because the umpire is out of position on a call, usually behind the play, thus allowing himself no clear view of the tag being made or the hands being on the base.  Last night that was not the case, as the ump at 2nd was in perfect position and had absolutely nothing blocking his view of both the tag and the hands other than his own stupidity.  Clearly a major fuck-up that deserves 4 out of 5 on the scale of 1-to-"You Gotta Be Fucking Kidding Me."

2) Top 4th- Nick Swisher called out at home for the final out of the inning after being ruled he left 3rd base before Torii Hunter made the catch in center field despite replays showing him being more on the base than previously thought possible.

Photo Courtesy of Barstool Sports NY

This was the worst kind of bad call, an obvious make-up call by Tim McClelland to cover for his buddy at 2nd base.  Typically make-up calls are more common in the NBA and NFL, but because they are so rare in baseball they are almost always important because they pop up in situations where runs either get put on or taken off the board.

Now Timmy was remorseful after the game saying that he "believed in his heart" that Swisher left 3rd base early.  I respect the guy for facing the music after the game and explaining his logic, that's what he should do.  But when you're reasoning for making the call was you "believed in your heart" that somebody did something, I have to call bull- and horseshit.  This isn't Disney World, dude; nobody's asking you wish upon a shooting star or click your heels together 3 times; this is Major League Baseball umpiring, a job that heart should never ever factor into.  Fuck your heart!!!  Use your fucking eyes!!!  Nick Swisher is standing 5 feet from you, clearly on 3rd base.  You've got 19 other umpires on your staff watching for the catch, which everybody and their mother knew Hunter was going to make, so take a fucking glance at Swish leaving 3rd before you decide to blindly call him out.

I would have a little more respect for McClelland if he would have just said "I believed in my heart and my eyes that Nick Swisher was out at second base earlier in the inning, so I decided to give that out back to the Angels and not allow the Yankees to score a run that they rightfully should not have if the 2nd base umpire made the correct call."  Don't give us this shit about hearts and dreams and fairies and rainbows, fess up to what you did and don't insult our intelligence.

A solid 5 out of 5 on the 1-to-"You Gotta Be Fucking Kidding Me" scale.

3) Top 5th- McClelland rules Robinson Cano safe and Jorge Posada out at 3rd on another play that took place within pissing distance of him even though the live play and subsequent replays showed Cano and Posada were clearly off the base when tagged by Angels' catcher Mike Napoli.

Photo Courtesy of Barstool Sports NY

Just look.  LOOK!!! FUCKING LOOK!!!!  Cano stood there like a jackass and Jorge never even tried to touch 3rd after running back.  They're standing right there, plain as printer paper, not on the base.  How does one fail to see this, especially when one's eyes are looking directly at the play and not at Torii Hunter in center field like one was the previous inning?  It's a clear 8.5/5 on the "You Gotta Be Fucking Kidding Me" scale.

I don't even know how to try to explain this one other than just saying that Tim McClelland is obviously part of Major League Baseball's and the Illuminati's worldwide conspiracy to ensure the Yankees win the 2009 World Series.  That's the only thing that makes any sense here.  Even though they were already up 5-0 and in complete command of the game, McClelland must have sensed that there was trouble afoot and wanted to give the Yankees a chance to score another insurance run.  Luckily for him, the Yankees managed to somehow scrap together another 5 to squeak by 10-1 and keep the plan in motion, exactly as it was predicted by the Mayans over 400 billion years ago.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!  THERE IT IS, FUCKFACES, READ IT AND WHEEP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Everyone can just stop playing now because when the Yanks have CC cruising, A-Rod smashing home runs, and Tim McClelland in their back pocket, nothing can stop them and nothing will stop them.

Hit the fucking music...

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