Monday, April 26, 2010

Presidential Pinstripes

(Photo courtesy of Getty Images)

"For a White Sox fan like me, its painful to watch Mariano's cutter.... Although, I do remember 2005, so don't get too comfortable," said Obama, referring to the White Sox World Series title five years ago.

Oh hahahaha-fucking-ha.  The President has jokes now.  Seriously, dude, shut the hell up and stand there with the jersey and then get back to work.  Just be thankful the Yankees were gracious enough to take time out of their busy schedule to show up at your place and bestow these priceless gifts upon you.  Holding the World Series trophy today was probably the closest you've been to feeling like a winner since November '08 so enjoy the moment, show a little humility and respect, and thank the Yankees for coming by to honor you with their presence.

P.S.- Does John Sterling even have facial muscles?  Look at the guy.  He looks exactly the same in every photo I ever see of him.  Creepy.

How's That Pitching And Defense Going?

(Yeah, I know it's old but that image pretty much sums up how Boston is playing right now)

It's good to know that even when the Yanks have a bit of a hiccup yesterday, we can always turn back to the good old Red Sox to put things in perspective. Here are some of the high(low)lights of Peter Abraham's article in the Globe today (courtesy of

The Red Sox finally admitted what everybody has known for several days, that Tim Wakefield is headed to the bullpen. Daisuke Matsuzaka will start in Baltimore Saturday.

And that's supposed to be an improvement?

Terry Francona tried to spin the move, saying the Red Sox weren't turning Wakefield into a reliever, they were just sending him to the bullpen until he makes his next start.

First off, if Francona is going to use that lame logic, he needs to cite his source. Cash and Joe already used the "starter coming out of the bullpen" gig for Joba at the end of Spring Training. Secondly, saying it that way is almost more insulting to Wakefield than just telling him he's getting demoted because he sucks. "Until his next start" is obviously code for "which hopefully isn't until somebody else in rotation gets hurt and we need him." If Wakefield was pitching well enough to make his next SCHEDULED start, he wouldn't have Dice-Gay taking his spot in the first place.

It's pretty grim when you allow 16 runs on 39 hits over three games to a team like the Orioles. They arrived in town hitting .225 with a .285 on-base percentage.

Wrong. Grim would be allowing 16 runs on 39 hits over 3 games against ANY opponent. Allowing that to the worst team in baseball who came in with team batting numbers like that is practically cause to sound the death knell.

The concern is that the Red Sox are not pitching well and have a roster full of mismatched pieces. There are two DHs...

Assuming his pathetic OPS still qualifies Big Sloppi to be called a DH.

...a catcher who can't throw...

2 catchers who can't throw, actually, if you count Varitek.

...and outfielders who hit at the bottom of the order more often than not...

But god-DAMN can they play some defense, huh?  I mean 14 errors and a 20th-place ranking in team fielding percentage??  THAT'S impressive!

In Wakefield, David Ortiz, Mike Lowell, and Jason Varitek, Francona also has four older players on the downside of their careers who believe they should be playing every day and aren't. Having two such players on the roster would be a lot to handle. He has four.

Just for the sake of comparison, the Yankees' 4 "old" guys currently have a .316 BA w/ 3 HRs and 12 RBIs (Jeter), .315 BA w/ 4 HRs and 11 RBIs (Posada), a 3-0 record w/ a 1.29 ERA and 1.07 WHIP (Pettitte), and 6 saves in 6 chances without allowing a run (Mo). Oh, and the Yankees are ranked 2nd in MLB in team fielding percentage and have only committed 6 errors so far.  No big deal.

 is If a team is winning, nobody can complain. But if 8-11 turns into 16-22, disgruntled players will find a forum in the clubhouse and Francona will have fires to put out.

And this is what happens when you commit to pitching and defense instead of winning. But hey, at least Boston doesn't have a shortage of options to use, right?. I'll take Javy Vazquez shitting his pants every 4-5 days over having to sift through the scrap heap that is Boston's bench for answers any day of the fucking week. BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Joe Still Can't Make Up His Mind

Early reports from the team hotel this morning indicate Joe Girardi couldn't decide what he wanted for breakfast this morning. He first told the waitress he wanted bacon and eggs, but then thought about it and switched to sausage and eggs.

He walked over to her 10 minutes later and thought about changing back to bacon and eggs, but stopped before he could get there and decided to stick with the sausage. 10 minutes later, after he finally decided to take 3 creamers in his coffee instead of 2, Joe got his breakfast delivered to his table only to have Kendry Morales come over and smack the whole plate out the window before Joe could pick up his fork.

Thank God Morales won't be at The White House today to cut the line and be the first to shake hands with Barry O. Although I wouldn't be shocked to find out Joe invited Morales anyway since he spent the whole weekend trying to make Kendry as comfortable and successful as possible.